musings of a jook sing: my semester abroad in hong kong

home at last

2009-01-23T14:22:00.004+08:00

Just came back from the first pub nite of the semester... and still recovering from the shock one feels when returning from time abroad. The people at and culture of Swat is far from what I found in Hong Kong. and I've got to admit that I missed it. It's only been about a week since I've returned to the U.S., and things have been moving so quickly. It's so strange returning to a place that's exactly the same as when I left it -- it feels as if I just dreamt the whole thing up.

I miss a lot of things from Hong Kong, but I can't say I'm sad to be back. It's really weird -- I've been overwhelmed with so many familiar (and unfamiliar) faces and my new classes that I haven't really thought about HK. I suppose it's better than feeling detached, but that really makes it feel like HK never happened. Hm.

More thoughts later... It's going to be hard to find time to blog now that I'm back at Swat, but I'm determined to post a few more entries about my travels and my last two weeks in HK after my program ended. And of course, reflecting on the trip now that I'm back. Until then...

brief encounters

2008-11-27T00:37:00.008+08:00

I arrived in Hong Kong with high personal hopes, expecting to immediately reach some kind of epiphany about my identity. What I ended up with, though, were weeks overwhelmed with meeting new people I never saw again, exploring tourist traps, and staying out late drinking in LKF. It was a lot of fun -- Hong Kong, this freedom to do as I pleased, everything was so new to me -- but I also felt a void in this mindless, exhaustive fun that I was having. It wasn't enough. It took a little while to adjust, but HK began to feel familiar, and I began to appreciate and love it for less obvious reasons. I spent more time with my aunt, I heard more stories about my mom, I began to wander around alone more. And I began to feel at home again.

Well, my time here is almost up, and I'm moved by just the mere thought of the whole experience, and the fleetingness of it all. We've come to live in this place for three months together and now share something that only we will understand the significance of -- shared motifs, if you will. We flew across the world and briefly touched the lives of each other, and we'll remember a lot of it as something almost surreal when we return and resume our lives at home. I'll vaguely remember my Cantonese teacher who made me laugh so hard I nearly cried during every class, and the lady who works at the counter in CC canteen who always knows what I'm going to order. I feel like I'm living in some kind of film, where all these different characters' lives get intertwined, and then leave each other, changed somehow. I am going to say goodbye to a lot of people I will likely never see again. And gradually, they're going to fade in my memory, to the point where I'll question whether they really existed as I remember them. And the thought that our paths may cross again one day is so overwhelmingly bittersweet.

I suppose it's something that you feel when you end any chapter in your life, but this one especially so, because these are people who come from such different backgrounds as me, but with whom I've managed to relate and share so much with. These are people who spent their lives across the world, living in an entirely different culture as me, and yet it has been so easy breaking down that barrier to find shared ground -- not in our favorite music or movies, but in in our shared sense of humor, our willingness to learn from each other. I know I'm a total cheeseball, but it all really goes back to the very core of what makes us human -- our capacity to feel...and to love.

A shot of my favorite short in Paris Je T'aime.

Weekend in Southern China

2008-11-10T23:56:00.055+08:00

At 4:30PM last Thursday, eight others and I (an interesting mix of four Americans -- two from Southern California, two from NYC -- one Englishman, two Germans, one Colombian studying in Germany, and one French girl) met at the University station and began our way to Shenzhen to catch our 13-hour sleeper train ride into Guilin. The ride was less painful than I expected -- we spent much of our time chatting in the dining cart, and then the rest sleeping. It wasn't the most comfortable night of sleep, but for a round-trip costing $70 US, it was definitely worth it.

We arrived a little before 7AM to rainy Guilin. The weather really put a damper on our arrival -- we spent a fair amount of time walking around in the rain looking for our hostel, and were soaked by the time we found it. So after cleaning up and throwing our stuff into our rooms, we set out to feed ourselves. We ate at a nearby restaurant and ordered four dishes of mǐfěn (米粉), a specialty of Guilin's. Then we set out to buy rubber boots, not exactly on our itinerary, but we were tired of walking around in wet shoes. After much dilly-dallying and wasting time running back and forth to the hostel, we finally set out and ventured to the Reed-Flute cave. It was pretty cool, but I was a bit turned off by how tacky of a tourist attraction it was. I didn't like being surrounded by hordes of tourists all taking the same pictures of the fluorescent lights that decorated the cave. Nonetheless, it was fairly fun playing with my camera inside to get some pretty cool shots with the lights. We also paid an extra 10 RMB to see the "thousand-year old turtle" inside the cave, which is just an absurd claim. Amusing, nevertheless.

Later that night, we headed out to a boat tour on Fir Lake in downtown Guilin. Another touristy attraction, but we managed to take over the deck and have a pretty sweet view of the city. The rain stopped by then, and the air was nice and crisp -- it was definitely an enjoyable time together. And given our short time in Guilin, it was a fitting way to sum things up for the night. We walked through a street market on our way back to our hostel, had a late-night snack at McDonald's, then called it a night.

At 8AM on Saturday, we were driven to the pier, where we set out on two private boats on a three-hour ride along the Li River to Yangshuo. Silly pampered me had imagined a big ship carrying all of us, but we were actually just crammed into ghetto little boats with a motor, and sat tight, strapped in life-jackets. I sat up front in the open air, and was so close to the edge that I could feel the water splash against me when I leaned too far out. I spent my time awake soaking in the beauty of my immediate surroundings -- here we were on this little boat, cruising along a narrow river for three hours and passing majestic mountains, waterfalls, and little villages by the water. But I spent a fair amount of time knocked out, because I'd taken Dramamine before the ride, and it kicked in halfway through.

The weather was clear when we arrived, and the scene was pretty bustling. There were tents set up by the dock trying to fish in tourists. We easily found our way to our hostel, which was very conveniently located near West Street, Yangshuo's most bustling street market, packed with restaurants and street food vendors. We had lunch at a nearby restaurant, which wasn't a particularly notable part of the trip except for the fact that we ate dog meat. The dish wasn't great, and the meat was a little too chewy for my liking. At least now I can say I've tried it.

What came next was easily the best part of the entire trip. We rented bikes for 10 RMB a piece, tandems for 15 RMB a piece, and rode all across and out of Yangshuo, to the Moon Hill (which was essentially a giant rock of a hill with a hole in it). We biked through different villages and witnessed incredible views. The whole experience was surreal. I actually can't ride a bike, so I rode in the back of a tandem with Justin. It was amazing -- I was able to take pictures during the entire ride since I didn't have to keep my eyes on the road. I really just pointed my camera in all different directions and clicked away without paying attention to the frame. It was more fun that way, and I ended up with some pretty neat shots.

We spent the night eating and wandering around West Street. We concluded the night at a bar, but we were all exhausted by that point and called it a night pretty early.

At 8AM on Sunday, our last day in China, we were driven to Longsheng, an expanse of mountains covered in rice terraces four hours outside of Yangshuo. We first stopped at a village inhabited by long-haired women, who display their marital status by the way they wear their hair -- covered if unmarried, worn in front if married with a child, worn in back if married with multiple children. It was a little less of a cultural experience than I'd hoped, because the ones we interacted with only wanted to sell us things. Everything costed money, and we decided against paying anything and just walked around aimlessly. Nonetheless, it was pretty cool.

Then we drove uphill a bit further and finally began our hike up to the very top. The view was marvelous -- the sun was out and we had a great view of the all the mountains blanketed by rice terraces. We climbed up and made a few stops along the way to soak in the view and take pictures. I ate dragonfruit for the very first time and it was delicious. Anyway, we hiked back down and left around 4PM. We had to head back to Guilin to catch our train back to Hong Kong.

We got to Guilin around 6PM in order to make time to see cormorant fishing, something we'd wanted to see on our first day in Guilin but weren't able to because of the rain. It is a form of fishing in which rope is tied around the necks of cormorants, a type of bird, and then thrown in the water to catch fish. They obediently catch fish in their beaks but can't swallow them -- then the fisherman yanks their necks and squeezes the fish out of their mouths, then throws them back in the water. It sounds pretty cruel, but it's a custom there, and it was pretty amusing to watch.

We didn't have time for dinner, and rushed to catch our sleeper train back to Shenzhen. 14 hours later, we found our way back across the border into Hong Kong, back in the familiar welcome arms of the omnipresent MTR voice and 7-Elevens galore. I headed back to my room, unpacked, and went off to my first class...

There is my entirely reflection-less but detailed recap of my weekend :-)

Guilin

2008-11-05T01:39:00.004+08:00

I'm going to Guilin, China this weekend! I was a little unsure about going at first, because I cringe at the idea of being on a train for 13 hours. I hate being idle. Or just being stuck in place for a long time. But I looked up photos of it, and I couldn't say no. Plus, I haven't traveled outside of Hong Kong at all yet (I am not counting Macau...that was so lame). And I just got my multiple-entry visa into China. And I suppose I don't have much work to do this weekend... Everything is pretty much in my favor for me to go. I've run out of excuses. So I'm going. Hooray.

Also, a draft of the exam schedule is up and it turns out I have three exams scheduled nearly back-to-back. I have one in the afternoon of 12/15, and then two back-to-back during the day on 12/16. Whhhhaaat the crap.

Anyway...I should probably try to digest some more linear algebra before I head to bed. Maybe not a wise idea to take this course abroad...

Another week in photos

2008-10-26T16:57:00.018+08:00

After the inevitable frustration that comes with cramming for exams, and then getting food poisoning, I gave up on school for the week. I skipped class to sleep in, and reasoned that I would be more productive studying on my own than attending lecture. Except that entails studying in the time that I would have gone to class, which I have yet to gather enough self-discipline to do.

I'm usually so much better at this. I don't know if it's just being in Hong Kong that is distracting me, or because I'm not a fan of the academics here. The lectures in all of my classes are really dry, largely because the professor's English is not very fluent and he relies on Powerpoint to teach the class. Nothing really sinks in in class, and I'm not really motivated to learn the material on my own either. Sigh.

Anyway, I'm trying to make up for the slack this week by working today. I've found my niche in the Pacific Coffee Company in Festival Walk, in Kowloon Tong. It's roomy and got decent coffee, but is way too crowded during the day. I'm currently sharing a tiny round table with two other people I don't know, and I'd much prefer to take over my own space. Shucks. But I'm really grateful for this place -- our school libraries close at 7PM on a Sunday night, which doesn't make sense to me. Plus, I've had a hard time finding real coffee, nevermind a coffee shop, around. I suppose Hong Kong folk aren't as driven by caffeine as New Yorkers. The stuff they serve in the canteens, and in food places in general, taste more like creamy coffee-flavored water. I hate that they use canned milk. It's between that or sweetened coffee in a can, for my daily dose of caffeine. :-(

Hong Kong is becoming a little less overwhelming, and I'm beginning to appreciate it more. Now that I'm a little more familiar with things here, it is starting to feel like being back in New York. Well, not quite, but I really love the anonymity of being in a busy city. It's kind of contradictory, but I feel less lonely when I'm in a busy place -- I feel like I'm allowed more personal space to introspect and explore on my own.

What have I been up to lately? I've been spending more time with my aunt, who has been really helpful so far during my stay in Hong Kong. She took me to daaih paaih dong last weekend, i.e. a cheap street "restaurant" with tables set up outside. The food is all cooked outside too. It's cheap, the food is great, and I think it keeps alive something genuine about Hong Kong. I've been complaining about how Hong Kong seems too outwardly flashy and superficial, but I think I just need to do a little digging in the right places. It's too bad I didn't bring my camera out that day, but I shall share the experience with you in another post!

I went to Ocean Park this past Friday, an amusement park in Hong Kong I've heard about in TVB dramas but never been to. They do a themed attraction at night for Halloween from September to November, separate from the daytime park. It was amusing and, thankfully, not scary. It was my first time in a haunted house that wasn't a ride, and it really caught me off guard when we first walked inside. I thought we were lining up to be seated, but soon realized (when things started jumping out at me) that I was wrong. But then I got the hang of it, and eventually my time inside trying to scare the people behind me.

And I celebrated my birthday yesterday. We watched High School Musical 3 at the IFC. The movie theater was really nice, and the movie was better than I expected. I'd really meant to watch it as a joke while drunk, but it was enjoyable, in the sense that it was mindless and amused the inner middle-school girl in me. I think they did a much better job this time around with the choreography though. The staging and choreography was a lot more elaborate and glamorous, and had a touch of fantasy, which made me happy because it resembled a musical so much more. And we all know how I feel about musicals :-) We went to Cafe Siam, a Thai restaurant in Soho, afterwards for dinner -- it was pricey, but the food was delicious. And then we walked to Lan Kwai Fong, and spent most of the night in Azure, the bar in Hotel LKF. I was very receptive to the DJ -- he was fantastic. It's the first time I've heard "Tub thumping" and Punjabi MC and the Macarena played on the dance floor, on the same night.

I suppose I should stop yakking now and capture my week in photos. Enjoy!

Ramen up my nose

2008-10-20T22:11:00.004+08:00

I was looking forward to tonight all week, but I feel lousy. I finished my last two midterms today, and aside from a math problem set due and Cantonese quiz tomorrow, my week is pretty much over at school. Which is great. BUT my immune system has given in. I almost threw up during my midterm today, so I gave up trying to look it over and just handed it in early. And then when I escaped from the crowd of people walking outside, I threw up all of my lunch. I've been feeling pretty miserable since, and it took me a while before I could eat something without hurling some more. A pear is the only thing that's settled in my stomach today. I think I'm coming on with a fever.

I sure hope I get better before the weekend. I'm turning 20. I'm still such an excited brat when it comes to celebrating my birthday :-) All should proceed to United Bar c. 5PM on Saturday and then watch HSM3 with me drunk. Yes!

Not the most informative post, but I'm essentially announcing that after ten days of dorm- and library-arrest and being a total lame-o, I am finally free to enjoy HK without worrying about exams. Read: Lan Kwai Fong, it has been too long. More posts and photos soon, I promise!

Week in pictures

2008-10-11T01:08:00.018+08:00

Let's not kid ourselves here... Locking myself in my room all day does not equate to getting any work done. I managed to resist going anywhere but the nearby dining hall and the gym today, but I didn't get anything done except for laundry and part of my Stat problem set. I know -- I'm pretty lame. I'm just making up for all the time I've spent not working. And that's a lot of time to make up for.

And now I'm going to further distract myself and avoid work by posting. Hurray!

I've been reading other people's blogs abroad, and realize that I'm doing a pretty poor job of capturing life as it is here in Hong Kong. Well, given that I've only really written a single real post since I've arrived... I should work on posting more frequently, first. This blog isn't really meant to be about life in HK. More just an outlet for me to share some personal thoughts/anecdotes with people who care to read it. I'll keep in mind to capture the more tangible stuff and avoid my usual mushy introspection crap, though.

In other words, more pictures, less words? Here are me and some of my friends, the other night at dinner:

I'm trying to make greater use of my SLR, but I hate carrying it when I go out. I usually stick with my good ol' Canon point-and-shoot. I bought a Nikon D40 and the SB-600 flash right before I came to Hong Kong, thanks to the recommendation of Jimmy. I'm a total amateur when it comes to photography, and sticking with a pack of people when I go out doesn't make it any easier to thoughtfully take photos. Meh. Speaking of cameras, I did buy myself a Diana camera finally! That will likely further distract me from SLR use, but I'm really excited to play with it. Except I don't have any 120mm film. And I have no idea where I can buy it. Until I figure that out... :-(

Before I get carried away, here are some more shots to capture my week. The first few are from Cheung Chau, small outlying island southwest of Hong Kong Island. We took a ferry there from Central on our day off this past Tuesday. All of the rest (except the last) were taken at a sushi place in Causeway Bay we ate at for Shella's birthday, the name of which I don't know. The last was just of my lunch, because I eat this at least every other day at school. It is roast duck on rice, costs about $2 US, and is fucking amazing.

Untitled

2008-09-28T22:29:00.023+08:00

I found out last week that there are two Swat alums teaching at CUHK, which was a pleasant surprise. I got an e-mail from one of them, inviting me to chat with him and his colleague, which I did last Thursday. Turns out they were both international students at the time ('73 and '75), one from Hong Kong and the other from Shanghai. I spoke to them in Cantonese too, which was kind of funny.

In other news, I managed to get kicked out of the original dorm I was living in. They are extremely uptight with the dorm regulations here, at least within the college I'm affiliated with. They got me for having a friend over past visiting hours. The whole process was so dumb, but ultimately, after two weeks of trying to appeal the decision to remove me from housing entirely, they agreed to let me do twenty hours of "community service" and to give me another place to stay. I suppose I'm pretty grateful that I still have a dorm to live in, but I'm pretty angry for how they dealt with the situation. Most of the people I had to talk to were really condescending, and treated me like some kind of criminal. It was only after apologizing a lot and showing incredible remorse, when I managed to wiggle my way out of what would have been an unimaginably rough situation of having no housing on campus.

Well, I'm glad that's out of my mind. It was lingering in the back of my head for the past three weeks and kind of stressing me out. Now, I'm free to worry about more trivial things, like finishing my problem sets and finding the new episode of Heroes online. Does anyone have access to that, by the way? I can't stream it off NBC since I'm not in the U.S., and I think I'm going to cry if I can't watch that anytime soon.

I tagged along with Shella and Dennis to CU Danso (the school's dance group) this afternoon, and it was a bit chaotic. I realize (and suppose, I already knew) -- I can't dance. Or at least, I'm pretty awkward when I try. You know, I keep thinking I'm still young and quick to learn things, so I should still experiment with new and unfamiliar things while I have the chance. At the very least, I'll gain a bit more perspective, right? But a part of me feels like I've pretty much established what I'm like, and it's hard to break out of what is familiar. I don't know. Maybe I should just loosen up and quit being so uptight?

I spent some time with my relatives in Hong Kong last week, after not seeing them for eight years. It was great! For the first time since coming here, I felt like I was taking a step towards finding out something about myself. My aunts told me about what my mother was like when she was younger, and how I'm a lot like her. My grandma's sister-in-law told me and my brother about how her husband passed away, in such elaborate detail. They were together for more than forty years, and shared something very special. It was beautiful how much she remembered -- down to exactly what they ordered to eat that morning, during dim-sum. And the way she told it made me think about how unexpectedly one can go. No one whose day brushed up against his knew that he was going to suffer a heart attack that very day, at 6pm. And that it was going to take his life, four hours later.

We also went to pay respects to my grandma, grand-uncle, and great grandmother last Sunday. It makes me a little sad that I'm one of the youngest ones in the family, so I've spent very little time with my older relatives. I wish I could just sit down with my grandparents now that I'm a little older, and talk to them. Two of my grandparents were already gone when I was born. My father's father passed away when I was ten, and my mother's mother passed away during my freshman year of college. It was a really sad fall break that year -- I went to visit her while she was paralyzed in the hospital. I had a whole conversation with her, because I was told she can actually hear what I say. I don't know if that was true, but thinking that and seeing her lay there paralyzed, made me feel something I'll certainly have a hard time forgetting.

Anyway, I don't mean to bring this post to such a serious note. I'm going to share with you a few photos:

Dinner with the famz.

Visiting my little cousin at the sushi place she works at.

We went to see the Big Buddha, but arrived too late. So we just took pictures outside.

The cable car ride to see the Buddha.

Lanterns on display during Mid-Autumn Festival.

Clams at some cheap side-street restaurant on Temple Street.

Dim sum at 3am, after a night in LKF.

Sigur Ros is performing in Tokyo on my birthday, and I really want to see them live but know that flying there and staying for a few days is unrealistic. But how sick would that be?!?! Probably the most memorable birthday, ever. Sad face. :-(

Fail, pt. 2

2008-09-27T04:32:00.006+08:00

My posts about life in Hong Kong are long overdue, and I'm sorry. So much has happened in the past month, and the idea of writing about all of it is daunting. I suppose I can do it in bits and pieces. And I suppose I can start now...

I'm the only one from Swat studying at CUHK, but interestingly enough, I've run into a few people from my high school here. CUHK is built on the side of a hill, which makes walking on campus frustrating, especially given the recent weather. It is hot and humid as fuck. The campus is enormous, and I have gotten lost many times in it. There is a lot of green, but it's not very scenic. Pictures forthcoming. Oh, and I saw a snake once on my way to class alone through a shortcut. I was terrified.

I'm having a lot of trouble coming up with something worthy of writing about. I guess I still spend a lot time trying to find my place here, and trying to find something meaningful in this experience. I didn't come here because I wanted to party and escape Swat for a semester. I guess I was hoping I'd immediately feel a sense of belonging here, given that my family spent many generations here. And given how traditional my parents are. But that is far from what has happened. Rather, I'm really priding myself on being American, which is unlike me. I don't know why I feel the need to flaunt my English or make cultural references to things only Americans would understand. And why I still feel uncomfortable speaking in Cantonese, even though I feel perfectly comfortable doing so when I'm back in New York.

Things are finally starting to slow down, and I'm hoping I get more down time soon. I spend a lot of time off campus: at shopping malls, street markets, arcades, karaokes. It's been a lot of fun, certainly a more exciting month than any that I can recall, but it's also been exhausting. Speaking of exhausting, I'm pretty tired. Headed to bed, more later...

Fail

2008-09-19T03:53:00.001+08:00

I know I haven't posted once since I've been to Hong Kong. Which really defeats the whole purpose of this blog. I've been here for almost three weeks now and I've barely had any time to reflect on it. It's just been an overwhelming mess of meeting new people and adjusting to life here. Classes started two weeks ago, but I feel like I'm still on vacation. I just wanted to say I'm sorry for sucking at keeping this blog updated. Expect a new post (with substance) soon...

Meanwhile, here's my new address:
Heidi Wong c/o IASP
Office of Academic Links
Lady Ho Tung Hall
The Chinese University of Hong Kong
Shatin, New Territories
HONG KONG SAR

Don't forget, get the moonlight out of your hair

2008-08-22T12:56:00.001+08:00

Countdown: 2 days 13 hours! Until I fly out anyway.

I had the fortunate opportunity to watch RENT on Broadway for free last night. Since RENT is leaving for good, they were filming the Broadway production and Christine and I got to watch it live. It was really fun and awkward, because this omnipresent voice kept stopping the show. They had to do a couple of songs more than once, and the actors were pretty funny in the awkward breaks in between. I think the entire show ended up lasting over three hours. It was also funny how they ended it -- they'd already sung the finale and taken their bows, and we were already standing up and applauding. And then the voice asked them to do that whole last part all over.

Anyway, they're going to release this in select movie theaters come September, so I highly recommend watching it if you've never seen it live before. I'm really glad they're doing this, because the RENT movie Sony made was a real let-down. It definitely does not live up to the Broadway production. I thought it was a bit too ambitious; it lost a lot of the musical, and just came across as a bad drama interrupted with songs that were out of place. It was much too sequential.

For me, a lot of the appeal in the Broadway performance is how ambiguous the setting always is and how the characters are almost always on stage together no matter who's in the spotlight. In every song where the cast sings together, if you keep a close eye on all of the background characters, you'll notice that each one is contributing to the story somehow. It is incredible how perfectly everything always blends in together, stage-wise and vocally. It's a bit overwhelming, and I feel like I learn something new about the musical every time I watch it.

The filmed version probably won't match up either, but I suppose that's as close as it gets! If only they'd filmed it when Adam Pascal and Anthony Rapp were still on stage. FYI, they were the original actors who played the main characters, Mark and Roger, and they returned to these roles briefly this past year. Sigh. I actually did not want to see RENT ever again after watching them in their original roles, because I wanted to preserve their performance as my last one (my third). It was a serious dream-come-true for me. But I couldn't say no to free tickets!

The performance last night was amazing anyway, and all of the actors did an incredible job. The only criticism I had was for the guy who played Roger, whose voice I thought lacked the sexy coarseness that Adam has, and was a bit too angry -- definitely not as smooth as Adam's standard. He also lacked good chemistry with the other actors on stage. I didn't really feel the love for Mimi. Also, was it just me, but did his "I should tell you"'s seem too rushed? A bit too pale and soft-looking... didn't look the part. I am being unreasonably critical. He sang very impressively.

Everything sounded very close to the original soundtrack, which I loved and most certainly appreciated. I managed to snap a few shots during the finale, when kicking me out of the theater wouldn't have mattered anyway.

Expiration dates

2008-08-20T06:36:00.000+08:00

Last week, I noticed for the first time that my stash of Polaroid film expires in February. That's when it really hit me hard that Polaroid was discontinuing its instant film. When I first read about it months ago, I comforted myself with plans to save the several packs I had left for at least a few more years. Plan failed.

After some lamenting and shoving my film to the back of my refrigerator, I decided to stop sulking over the death of the Polaroid and, rather, make more use of my equally awesome Holga. It doesn't quite provide the same instant gratification or have the timeless white backing that so perfectly pins onto a corkboard. Sigh. But at least the photos are still square, the colors beautifully saturated, and the quality surreal.

And there are many cool ways to modify it. I finally worked up the effort to modify it to shoot 35mm film. The results I've seen from other people are fabulous -- being able to see your image with (and around) the sprocket holes from the film somehow makes the moment seem more beautiful (see here). That, plus the Holga's defective quality, really make the photograph feel timeless and original, unlike a digital print you can print within seconds at an automated machine at the local pharmacy. I'm still not very good with my Holga, but I eventually hope to shoot photographs and capture moments that feel like sad, lost memories, like these (Actually, those were taken with a Diana, but who needs to know?)

Anyway, I made the mistake of using really old film I found at home. Really old. I reckon they expired several years ago. So there is a daunting red glare in every photo, but at least I learned my lesson now. Check expiration dates.

I got it processed in Chinatown, at 88 Images, but they turned down prints because they said they didn't have the equipment to do it. So I did a little more research about affordable photo labs and trekked over to Lustre Photo in East Village to get them scanned onto a CD. Unfortunately, they didn't turn out the way I expected. No sprocket holes. I called and asked if this was the result of a misunderstanding, but they said they aren't capable of scanning it that way. Unless I forked out a shit ton of money to individually drum scan each photo. I did some more research, found out that I can actually scan the negatives myself with a flatbed scanner, tried it with my scanner, and then got frustrated with my cheapo scanner when it didn't work. I still have negatives waiting to be scanned, but I've already dedicated too much time and money to this roll of film that turned out to be way too old anyway. So I'll wait until I come back from Hong Kong to further frustrate myself over the matter. Meanwhile, I still have some pretty interesting prints:

I walked around Sunset Park's 8th Avenue, what is known as Brooklyn's Chinatown, trying to capture it as I know it. I grew up in the area, and spent much of my time here, so I thought it'd be neat to sneak in some candid shots. Plus, who thinks of this when they think of the glamorous New York City? I got yelled at by some crazy Chinese ladies for taking their photo, but I just pretended like I didn't understand what they were saying. Damnit, if only the film weren't so old!

In an effort to pack light, I'm not bringing my Holga with me to Hong Kong, but I'm considering buying a Diana while there... Where better to buy one than where it originated? :D

"Go home chink eyes"

2008-08-19T11:03:00.000+08:00

Hooray! I acquired some angry fuel today to drive along my first entry.

This morning, I signed on to facebook to the message, "Congratulations to Michael Phelps and all of the U.S. athletes." Naturally, with my ability to spend many hours on the internet clicking away at useless things, I clicked on to Phelps' page. And then clicked on the first thread I saw. And then read it. And then got really mad and reported it.

The girl who started the post asked whether Phelps was gay. Admittedly, it was a dumb and groundless thread, but a harmless one. Whatever. If anything, I think it's kind of funny and to be expected. Nothing was worth getting worked up over, until I read the blatantly racist responses.

This thread I happened to click on was written by an "Elizebeth Leung" and she was immediately attacked because of her name. One of the first responses was "your just angry because he beat China in every event." Right. Because the name Leung must mean that she is ethnically Chinese and therefore from China. And because there aren't more than 3,000,000 ethnically Chinese people in America? Some other poster reiterated the same obnoxiously racist sentiments I found at the window of Geno's Cheesesteaks (they sell shirts that say "This is AMERICA: When ordering, please speak ENGLISH'"). Why is it so wrong of people if they've never had the privilege to learn it? I wish they'd do away with this patriotic I-love-America crap and actually sympathize with these less-than-wealthy immigrants just honestly trying to make a living.

I know that when my parents came to the U.S., they had a really rough time juggling less-than-minimum-wage jobs as factory workers and taking care of my two brothers by themselves. They didn't come knowing any English because they never had the luxury of attending school in Hong Kong. And how can you expect a newly-immigrated working couple with two sons to work out enough time and energy to learn English? That wasn't what they were most concerned about -- they just wanted to make enough money to get by and raise us comfortably so that we can have an easier life. I admire them immensely for coming so far with so little, and can't bear other ungrateful privileged folk snickering at their inability to speak fluent English.

I probably shouldn't be angered so easily by something as trivial as an online thread, but it really brought out the defensive and resentful person I can be, knowing all that my parents have gone through. I just wish they'd be a little more open-minded, a little less proud, and stop and realize that somewhere along the line, their ancestors had immigrated here without speaking English, either. And finally, some jackass kid said something along the lines of "go home chink eyes im sick of all you illiterates crowding up the south." The nerve! Anyway, I reported that post. Asshole.

What's the lesson here? Don't aimlessly click on dumb online forums. Until my next encounter with something that pisses me off!